my long distance boyfriend :)

Today, i feel so dissapointed. because when i browsing in Youtube i find a video from Jason Mraz -I Won't Give Up. i played it on my itunes and i dont know why, suddenly i feel so sadly.
the lyrics :

I won't give up on us

Even if the skies get rough

I'm giving you all my love

I'm still looking up

And when you're needing your space

To do some navigating

I'll be here patiently waiting

To see what you find

because this video reminds me with my long distance boyfriend, Derek Howard, he lived in Perth, Australia. i met him when i searching in socmed and since then he text me everyday and someday he send me a letter (for the first time i received a letter from stranger) but i am so happppppy. and then i told to my parents if i know Derek from socmed and i really love him somuch. we often send a letter to each other, he gives me a beautiful gift for my birthday. a inspired Book, a cute Koala's doll, a gorgeous mug, a lovely keychains :)

cute koala :)

lovely keychains

sexy eyemask :)

inspired novel 

his first letter

his first letter

his second letter :"

and i haven't replied his letter :( because i am busy, so busy with my stuff.
i forget him... actually this is so hurt.
i need him, i want to visit him in Australia, i want to married with him someday, i want him to know about the religion of Islam.

and now, i dont know how exaclty about our relationship.
he told me that he loves me, cares me, and i read his last letter, he asked me to marry him :)) a little shock lol


and you know Derek, today i really miss you so damn :|
i want to text you, but i am afraid, i swear :|
i hope you still remember me :))) now and forever.
because actually i am very sorry to haven't replied your letter and never reach you.
as soon as possible, i will contact you :)))

love you, Anita
xoxo